photos of some of our runs up Kong!
for one of the more strange ramblings from the Rage. He
actually stopped during a run to trash talk a defenseless
deer carcass, which chose the most unfortunate place to
succumb to the elements: about 60 yards from the summit
of a 2,000 foot
vertical ascent 3+ mile run on a mountain fondly named
"Kong" by the Coop after he ran Kong the
was drawn from Coop's days on Mt. St. Helens. When
it rumbled, Coop's crew would say "Kong calls."
Legend has it that when you give less than a respectable
effort during an ascent of Kong, you suffer his mighty
wrath...clearly which must have been the case of this
poor deer, who could not handle the Truth a mere 60
yards from the summit...
THAT ALL YOU GOT! YOU BETTER AT LEAST HAVE HAD A
GOOD TIME GOING. COME ON! FINISH THE WORKOUT! AND
DON'T GIVE ME ANY OF THAT "BUT I AIN'T GOT
NO SWEAT GLANDS" EXCUSE, EITHER!
goes over the edge as the Rage relates a dream about
the deer actually coming back to life and lying
in wait during his next ascent of Kong...medication
is helping, but the prognosis is not good...
by Ross Eberhart,
woke up from a bad dream the other night.
Something about a deer that was
waiting for us at the yellow gate, just before the top
could see him, standing in an unusual position, kind
of up on his hind legs leaning against the gate staring
at us as we ran up the hill...not moving an inch when
we got to the gate. Then, he proceeds to start this
jabbing thing right in my face with his front hoofs...yelling
something that sounded like "...no sweat glands,
eh?...well start sweating, pal..." Trying to escape,
I thought I could outrun him to the top...but he kept
right in stride and continued to jab
as I was about to pass out, I suddenly began to levitate...my
legs still churning as I watched the surreal scene
below me unfold. In his quest to pummel me, he had
strayed too far into the sun and now had begun to
stagger back toward the shade. Just as he nearly reached
his safe haven he was met by a furious onslaught of
trash talk, unmatched by anyone on the planet...yes...Manclark
stood between the deer and the shade, and launched
a tirade so ferocious that Kong himself peered over
the trees to witness the relentless barrage of "your
fawns wear Nikes..." and "your wimpy rack
wouldn't even qualify for the wall behind the juice
bar at the DAC...."
mentally demoralized deer then collapsed just short of the
blacktop and immediately began to rot...
far as the "levitating" Logan you might ask?...Kong
then gently set his sorry self back down on the blacktop
saying "...my son...I have saved you one too many
times on my hill...you can go now, but the fate of the
deer awaits you for anything I deem as an unacceptable
effort up my hill..." Turning to the smirking Manclark,
Kong says "...as for you, Mr. Slope...you will get
a bear next time...with Nike swooshes for eyes and a tattoo
of Phil Knight on his butt. The very sight of that should
instill enough rage in you to make it a pretty even match.
I would gladly make another appearance to see that for
myself...now get off my mountain...."
Then I woke up.